Oh California I sure do miss you!!

I am a California girl born and raised. I did move away for a short time for college, I didn't go fat though... Las Vegas!! Anyways back to my point. I am a California girl or at least I was until I left everything I knew for a simpler life in Tennessee (my parents moved there I followed yatta yatta long story). This may will be 6 years since I left my home land and for the first time I have having serious withdrawals! I miss my home, my life, the atmosphere, my friends and family. I miss California. 

So in honor of everything I am missing I thought I would share some photos with you that remind me of who I am or at least who I once was. 

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Huntington Pier! 

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I use to work at the Starbucks next to this Bob's located in Toluca Lake. 

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My car wash Burbank. Okay it's not "mine" but I use to get my car cleaned there! 

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Joshua Tree National Park! 

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Life changing for the better!

A few months back I posted that I had received a scary and life changing diagnosis. It has taken me a while to write this post. I haven’t blogged about my diagnosis yet. I don’t want to down play its importance, I wanted to educate myself and needed to take the time to realize my life was changing forever. I am not dying, I didn’t get something that was going to kill me today but if I didn’t change my life TODAY it would kill me eventually. 

Your life can change any day. It can change today for all we know. I was in disbelief when I went in for a check up back in January. 2 days after my 27th birthday I went to the doctor for a check up it was a fun one blood urine the works. For a while doctors have been monitoring my blood pressure. The last few time I had been in it was higher than normal especially for someone my age and general health. Then we did some more tests and other fun stuff. I left the doctor with the diagnosis of Hypertension stage 1 and prehypertension. (my systolic pressure averages around 150 the normal would be less than 120 and my Diastolic 85 with normal under 80). Need I remind you I am only 27 years old. Commence freaking out on my part. 

There are 5 main causes of high blood pressure: excess alcohol, kidney disease, increased consumption of salt, overweight or obese and family history. 

Although, I am (or was when diagnosed) slightly overweight (about 10 pounds) the only cause I have is Family history. My father was diagnosed when I was a kid he was in his 30’s. I remember when my parents told us we were scared, we tried (and failed) at not stressing him out. I remember him having to take medication. I decided early on that I wasn’t going to take medication at least not yet. I was going to combat this the healthy natural way! 

So lets flash back post babies and marriage. Growing up, during college and after I was always fairly active playing sports and running. I can remember being at my lowest weight 137 just months prior to getting pregnant with my oldest. (keep in mind I am 5’10’’ so thats pretty skinny) Back then I ran 3-4 miles every morning for fun!!! 

Flash forward 6 years and 3 babies. I was working out maybe 2-3 days a week half heartedly and eating what I wanted. * What I wanted wasn’t all that bad we don’t eat much processed food, we stay away from preservatives, eat organic and about 60% fruit, veg and grains. 

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Since my diagnosis I have made some big changes. I now work out 5 days a week. But more than working out I have completely overhauled my eating. Sodium is now to a minimum with less than 2300 mg daily, cut out alcohol, eliminated all hydrogenated oils and margarine, we eat brown now (only 100% whole wheat and brown rice) and I am now a vegetarian. 

Let me say this I feel GREAT! I have been on this new track food and diet for 2 weeks and I have lost 10 pounds. But more than weight loss like I said I feel great. We need to LIVE TO EAT not EAT TO LIVE. 

When I first received my life changing news I was scared I’m not gunna lie. Now I find it empowering! My life has changed, my health has changed, I am changed for the better. I truly believe this is a blessing! 

Sleepless nights creates lack of concentration

Why am I so interested in whats happening on My Little Pony? I’ll tell you why... It has been a rough start to the week. I’m not going to lie I have had little motivation to get going in the morning. We have had one sick kiddo after another. Last night I clung to the side of the bed while my 5 year old made her sneezy, coughing, booggery self comfortable. My husband slept like a baby! ERRRR being a mom. 

On a way happier and more positive note I made the most delicious treat this morning. Banana oatmeal cookies! 

A kick butt soccer game and the truth about the Easter bunny.

I am going to start this post with a bit of totally awesome news!!!! Payton is totally rocking soccer. I just needed to find her motivation. Apparently, it was different than mine. When I was a kid and into my High school years my dad would have to yell at me get me mad and I would ROCK! It totally made me more aggressive. I know weird but hey thanks dad you made me a better player. This does not work with Payton she likes things... Before her game last night I told her if she scored two goals I would get her something special... SHE KICKED BUTT!!!! She scored twice, she was super aggressive, she actually ran, she was defiance, she asked for the ball, I am one proud mama. Not that I’m not always proud but I could tell she was putting in 100%! So we went out and got ice cream! 

Then I found out this happened...

My husband went on a walk the other day she asked him about the Easter bunny and he was honest... 

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My husband actually told her there was no Easter bunny and explained the real reason we celebrate Easter. Part of me wanted to kill him. Seriously, I was so so mad! I called him at work I gave him a piece of my mind then I got over the shock and then the bigger part of me totally understand stood . She's five I get that, and I totally want her to live a great childhood. Does it have to be filled with lies? And where does it stop? I am not ready to talk about the big man in red. But I don't agree with the Easter bunny.
What is a good age to explain these lies to your kids? Is it fair to let them find out from other kids? Where do we draw the line? 

Dear Payton

The idea for this post comes from my friend and fellow blogger Candace over at Hippie at Heart. She has written to her daughter Harper as a way of documenting and reflecting on where they are in their journey. When I read her first post, Dear Harper, I was inspired to do the same with each of my children. My Children are a bit older so there will be some reflection. I hope to one day share these with my children so they can see themselves through my eyes and know how much I truly love them.  

Dear Payton, 

You are an amazing child. You will forever be my baby. When You were born my world changed. I was scared. Alone. Heartbroken. Sad. But more than anything I was overwhelmingly happy. You came into this world a perfect baby weighing less than six pounds and small enough to fit into one hand. But you had legs. Oh girl you sure did they stretched on forever. When you were born I was so clueless on how to be a mother, you made it so easy. You healed me. 

Over the years you have grown so much. You have an amazing mind. So incredibly smart and loving. One of my favorite memories of you comes from the day we brought your little brother Preston home from the hospital. You loved him so much. The first night was a tough one he woke up a few times and each time you would come into our room and stand there ready to help. It was like it was your duty as his big sister to help. Things are a bit different these days. Your brother is almost 4, and in your eyes he’s just in your way. He loves you so much. He looks up to you and in so many ways he wants to be just like his big sister. 

You are an amazing child. I love being with you. Talking. Singing. Playing. Learning. I learn from you all the time. So much of me is afraid for you to get older. I know I will lose you. At some point you will want to spend more time with your friends than me. And some day you will not want to be around me at all. I’m guessing this will happen around middle school. And if you're anything like me it will last years. This breaks my heart. Just know I love you so much. I know you will do great things. 

You have changed my life so much. You have made me who I am today.  

I love you so so very much. 

Mom

Weekend in rewind

Have I ever mentioned that I don't like the cold. That might be putting it a bit to kindly I HATE the cold. Having grown up in southern California cold weather didn’t come around all that often. For me cold is anything below 60 and even there I am not happy. My body seems to be programed for warmer weather. I think 100 sounds good even with the usual mix of humidity we get in the south. But the cold even at 60 is likely to keep me indoors. 

The Miller weekend was uneventful to say the least. My oldest was sick nearly all weekend. Which kept me indoors with her most the weekend. I secretly didn’t mind, it was in the 50s. 

She did make it to sell Girl Scout cookies with her troop for an hour but shortly after resumed her post; under a mound of blankets on the couch.  

The kids did dress up and have a dance party .

My older two tried to teach the little one how to jump. 

Yes, that is a little boy prancing around in a pink cloth diaper. 

How was your weekend? How do you handle cold/warm weather? 

Valentines recap and a sick baby

As I posted yesterday, not a big fan of the hallmark holiday Vday! I had a good day though. It was busy one of our busiest yet. Yesterday was filled with Tae Kwon Do, crafts, gifts, potted tulips (my hubby knows me well), cards, hand prints, and soccer practice. There aren't any pictures of soccer practice :( I forgot my camera and my phone was updating. 

Around here we’ve started the weekend with a fever... My oldest is staying home today with a 101. Her brothers are helping her get better by watching cartoons in bed! 

Happy Valentines and It's okay Thursday

I’m just going to say this I am not a big Valentines day gal. Don't get me wrong I love flowers and chocolate just as much as the next gal. Well, maybe not just as much you see I think potted living flowers are much more appealing than ones that will die in 3-7 days. Chocolate heck yes there... but I wont be eating any this year :( 

But I will use this opportunity to write about love. That’s what today is all about right?

I’m not a big mushy gushy I love you gal. I don’t really see love like most people do. I see love as a conscious choice. A choice that using good sense we decide to make. 

I guess I am just not a romantic love at first sight type of gal. I can totally understand how people reading this can think that maybe I am just a little nuts. I think my views on love make more sense at the other end of love, the part where loving someone is over. It might be easier to think about if you think about choosing to stop loving someone. 

It’s okay Thursday

It’s okay: 

to not be completely in love with this holiday.

to be completely in love with your spouse (thats me)

that on day 2 of lent I already want some coffee.

to be overly excited about paint and sip class tomorrow.

that my picture will likely be horrible. 

soccer practice was cancelled 2 of 3 days this week (thank you rain). 

I think I may have signed the kids up for too many activities... 

that today is Valentines day. 

I hope everyone has a wonderful Valentines day!

Life truly is wonderful

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 I am not an eternal optimist to be honest most days I find little to be optimistic about. That being said I wouldn't call myself a pessimist either. I am a realist. Yes, for those of you wondering or doubting there is a difference. I don’t see the world as bad nor do I think that only negative or bad things happen. I am just real about what is happening and what is going on. This coupled with my blunt honesty has gotten me into trouble especially when I was a child. 

Now as an adult with children of my own I have learned to holster this (at least when they are around). My children remind me of all the good there is in the world they also project their undying optimism onto me. They honestly believe everything is okay and will be okay which I find wonderful. 

Children are amazing creatures. God did a fine job when creating the Childs mind. 

Life is so good and sometimes we get caught up in this crazy world that we forget how truly blessed we are. 

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We live in a beautiful world we just have to be willing to choose that beauty. You have to recognize that beauty. 

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I tend to get stuck. I see the world beyond my own front door and I see all the bad. Everything ugly going on out there in the world. I should and we should focus on what is happening here in our homes with our families. 

So many people get lost in far away hopes and dreams; a life where the grass is greener. I once read, “the grass is always greener where you water it.” This just makes sense! The grass is and will be green where you put in the most effort. 

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Well this has been a bunch of half baked thoughts from a realist. 

Happy Birthday Cooper!!

I officially no longer have a baby. Two years ago today was the worst day of my life. 

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made his official entry into the world 5 weeks early and fighting for his life. Immediately after being born he was rushed away without a word to me. The first few hours were painful and scary. I was told so little the nurses and doctors just seemed to avoid my room. It was more than 8 hours later before I got to see my baby. He looked so sad and helpless hooked to machines and tubes. I was lost. My husband had been deployed only days earlier and had just arrived in Kuwait. Communication was bad I couldn’t get ahold of him. Cooper was nearly a day old before my husband even knew he had arrived. Because Cooper was born so early his little body was underdeveloped especially his lungs and liver. We spent the first week not even knowing if he would ever leave the hospital. Then in the second week  things started to look up we was beginning to breathe on his own only to get sick again. He started to get feverish and his vitals were weakening. I was so lost. The Army didn't believe his situation warranted his father to return home. I spent most of my time alone in thought. Thinking and blaming myself for his early arrival. Maybe if I would have taken things easier, or eaten better, or even something as simple as taken my vitamins. I couldn’t help but feel like everything was my fault. After almost 3 weeks in NICU my guy got to come home. Perfect and completely healthy. He does still prefer to sleep with the lights on (this we think is because there were always lights on in the hospital). I’ve grown to love that about him. For him sleeping with the lights on is comforting for me it reminds me of what we went through to get here. 

2 years old today. I am beyond happy to reach a day that at one time I wasn’t sure we would ever reach. 

Cooper is just about the funniest and happiest kid out there. He is my little surfer 

You make me smile and laugh so much! I am so thankful for you. 

Happy birthday Cooper! You are my miracle you have forever changed my life. 

Happy birthday to me.

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** The majority of this post is a recount of a conversation with my best friend who will also be turning 27 soon.

27 now that's a no shit you are a grown up age. Back in high school when I saw someone who was 27 I thought they were old, mature, accomplished and you guessed it grown up. I think a lot of people have put too much emphasis on the big 3 0. (I might feel differently in a few years) Right now 27 seems rather legit.

A wonderful 26 years behind me (not that 26 isn't old enough but I remember when I was a kid my grams once told me that odd numbers seem bigger).

27 going to be great just like 26, 25, 24, 23, 22, 21, 20.... you get the point. So anyways happy birthday to me.

Starting my 30 b4 30 goals

I made my list about a month ago of 30 things I want to do before I turn 30. Now it's time to get started on a few things. I want to get started on the long turn goals now this way they become habits that I cary into my 30th year.
Here are the goals I've chosen to get started on:
8. Set a daily schedule that includes scripture and prayer
9. Maintain 3 days a week exercise
10. Build a menu that works month to month
26. Routinely drink more water
30. Build a better stronger marriage with my husband

5 at one time that can seem like a lot to start but if you really look at the goals it's really only 3 and in some ways 2. These goals are interlocked.

This morning I began by breaking out my bible. I've decided to start with Matthew and to read from there. Faith, religion and prayer are things I have struggled with in the past, I believe in Jesus and God I just don't have a great relationship or connection. I am striving to gain this. Advice wanted! What is your daily schedule like? Do you include daily scripture and prayer?

For the past 6 weeks I have been working on a couch to 5k plan with a friend of mine. Things are going as expected I have my good days and my not so much ones. More than anything I am just proud of us for sticking to it for this long! Doing good on the 3 days a week of exercise. How often do you exercise, what does your routine look like?

I make my weekly meal menu every Friday. Every friday I am at a loss on what to cook. We eat a variety of food I just always seem to forget something. I want to make a meal plan that is a no brainer. This can be a little tougher for our eating habits than most (we try to stay away from preservatives, HFCsyrup, dairy milk, most meats, and eat all natural organic as much as we can). What is your meal planning strategy? Cost saving advice?

Water, water, water. I really struggle to make myself drink enough daily. It's really not that I drink a bunch of crap I'll simply go through the day and drink nothing. To kick start my water drinking I am taking part in resolution in motion a plan to get my drinking going. You can read my steps to success for me on the link and offer advice here or there. I must be doing something right though I wore out my water bottle!

Building a better stronger marriage with my husband. This might be the hardest one for me. It's not that I don't love him. In all honesty being an affectionate and outwardly loving person just doesn't come natural. Being a mom and good home maker come natural to me being a good wife not so much. I am hoping by building a better relationship with God this will help me with my husband. How have you built your marriage?

Wonderful weekend

I love the holidays! I love the food and the family.
This year my brother hosted the big turkey day. He and his wife made a wonderful dinner. She made most of it and still had time to make everything beautiful.

It was great day the kids all got to play outside thank you warmer weather! When the sun went down the adults got to play hello poker!

So Black Friday shopping who went? Was it worth it? How about cyber Monday? I don't do the whole going out at some crazy hour shopping. Mostly because I try to finish all of my shopping by Thanksgiving. This year I did order 2 leapfrog game cartridges for my kids they were like a third of the original price but thats it.

Potty training might just kill me {UPDATE}

To read the back story go here.

This is my sweet boy Preston.

Let me define sweet: determined, stubborn, rotten, hard headed, and at the flip of a switch the sweetest most loving boy on Earth.

As I talked about previously he's well behind the potty training curve. My big boy is almost 3 1/2 I know. We've been trying and trying and trying FOREVER. FOREVER=11 months. Last week we (husband and I) decided we would take a break. Everyone was burnt out on trying to get Preston to go on the potty. Even our 5 year old was tired of all of it. So we took a week long break be went back into diapers and resumed his role as a forever baby.

Monday morning we got up and I let preston know he was no longer a baby. That he was done with diapers. We sat on the potty and we went potty. It's now Friday and this has been a great week. Yes, he's had accidents. Yes, I've gotten frustrated. But only twice. In 4 days only twice. In this family this is something worth celebrating.

Being a mamma to this little guy is so much easier when I'm not having to nag about the potty. I hate to say it but potty training this little man was making me not enjoy my role as a mom. We were all so stressed. I'm not saying its over, but my goodness it's so much better.

Have you ever had a situation like this where you had to stop completely in order to accomplish what you started?

My husband

I am not an outwardly affectionate person. (probably one of my biggest faults) I am not one to praise and or brag about my husband but today I want everyone to know that I am very proud to call this man

my husband. He as made huge sacrifices for his country most without complaint. He's missed births, birthdays, anniversaries, first days, graduations and much more to serve and defend the country we both love so much. I feel so blessed to have him in my life.

It's okay...

That I gave my youngest a Leap pad to fall asleep for nap.
I just ate my 3rd piece of candy today.
Thats I am getting the house ready for Christmas.
That the dryer is on its second go around.
That I have a pile of laundry waiting to be folded and I am leaving it for tonight.
I've only completed about half of my todo list and I'm done.

Pumpkin patch 2012

Well this is more than slightly overdue since it wasn't last weekend that we went but the weekend before.
I love going to pumpkin patches the husband could do without. After 5 years of marriage I have figured out why. By the way he has a GREAT time at this patch. Growing up in southern California we just didn't have pumpkin patches. There really wasn't even fall. I moved to Tennessee and had my first child all in the same year. I also started visiting pumpkin patches that same year. And year after year 5 now the husband came along reluctantly. By the end of the day he'd be complaining about this and that. Ha not this time, he too had a BLAST.

My husband was totally in his element trying to teach a 3 and 5 year old how to rope a cow.