Happy Birthday Cooper!!

I officially no longer have a baby. Two years ago today was the worst day of my life. 

My

made his official entry into the world 5 weeks early and fighting for his life. Immediately after being born he was rushed away without a word to me. The first few hours were painful and scary. I was told so little the nurses and doctors just seemed to avoid my room. It was more than 8 hours later before I got to see my baby. He looked so sad and helpless hooked to machines and tubes. I was lost. My husband had been deployed only days earlier and had just arrived in Kuwait. Communication was bad I couldn’t get ahold of him. Cooper was nearly a day old before my husband even knew he had arrived. Because Cooper was born so early his little body was underdeveloped especially his lungs and liver. We spent the first week not even knowing if he would ever leave the hospital. Then in the second week  things started to look up we was beginning to breathe on his own only to get sick again. He started to get feverish and his vitals were weakening. I was so lost. The Army didn't believe his situation warranted his father to return home. I spent most of my time alone in thought. Thinking and blaming myself for his early arrival. Maybe if I would have taken things easier, or eaten better, or even something as simple as taken my vitamins. I couldn’t help but feel like everything was my fault. After almost 3 weeks in NICU my guy got to come home. Perfect and completely healthy. He does still prefer to sleep with the lights on (this we think is because there were always lights on in the hospital). I’ve grown to love that about him. For him sleeping with the lights on is comforting for me it reminds me of what we went through to get here. 

2 years old today. I am beyond happy to reach a day that at one time I wasn’t sure we would ever reach. 

Cooper is just about the funniest and happiest kid out there. He is my little surfer 

You make me smile and laugh so much! I am so thankful for you. 

Happy birthday Cooper! You are my miracle you have forever changed my life.